What’s the Problem? Autonomy!

Posted on October 1, 2018May 30, 2023 by Brook Thornley

“Can’t you see they are not telling the truth!”
“How can you stand there and say that with a straight face?”
“Our group is strongly opposed to your group’s view.”

It doesn’t matter if it is an individual talking to another group of people, a family, a gathering of people who love each other, or in the work place trying to agree on a project or a strategy; when groups of people are polarized it creates a great deal of chaos and stress. It is equally as difficult when the distance between the disagreeing parties has gotten to the point that contention is so strong it feels as if it would be impossible to walk it back to a neutral place again. This is a very dangerous place to be because the next thing to happen in these types of group interactions is the group starts to destroy the order and integrity of the group and it starts to disintegrate. What can a group do when it finds itself in this very dynamic?

First, I assure you it is possible to get back to a healthy place of interacting with each other in a neutral way and still keep our opinion and preferences intact.

Second, its actually something that happens rather quickly.

We must stop and ask, “WHATS THE PROBLEM?” And the answer always has something to do with autonomy!!!

Autonomy is basically our independence or ability to have self-freedom.

Quietly in your head, stop and describe everyone’s autonomy that is in the large group, including your own. This will allow you to respect your own views and come from a place of security and personal power; from that point you are in a position to celebrate and appreciate others’ point of view. State your needs, speak of your preferences, describe what you are focused on according to your design (we call that a central focus), and have the courage to be a little vulnerable, no matter how others react to it. Share your challenges in a real and genuine way. Try hard to be authentic and not manufacture a egoic version of strength. Use the power you already have, your personal power. No one can truly criticize it because you know it better than anyone else, you are the only on with it.

Here is an example:
A very Saturated man and a Saturated teen were working together on a project. They were assigned to work on the project with a very Grayed woman and a really Whitened young adult.
the two Saturated people were in agreement that the project needed to come across professionally and that the objective needed to be clear (they share that central focus). Things were going great until the Grayed women came into the planning meeting and introduced a very thorough list of questions that needed to be asked about the project before any decisions were to be made. The group spent a few minutes debating what the main the focus should be until tension was mounting in the small planning room. The Saturated man and the Saturated teen were starting to strategize how they could side step the Grayed woman’s list while the Grayed woman was feeling frustrated and found herself asking more and more questions until she went to her next strategy of shutting down and beginning to resent. The two groups were quickly losing credibility with each other. it was then that the Whitened adult came in and stated the Whitened central focus that always includes socializing and declared, “are we having fun yet?!”

Stop right here!!!!!

This is the very moment when it is time to quietly say, “Whats the problem?…Autonomy!” In this moment, the group should start to review everyone’s autonomy, starting with the central focus of each person’s design.

The Saturated man and teen want quality and that comes from clear objectives and professionalism.

The Grayed woman is thorough and usually prevents problems before they even arise.

The Whitened man makes sure everyone stays engaged and can tell before others even start to notice anything is wrong that someone is about to withdraw or shut down and re-engages them in a safe way.

When these central focuses are looked at in this light that is when we can quickly step back into healthy and neutral interactions. It is at this point we can listen. Our curiosity goes up and self-doubt goes down. It is also at this point we start to celebrate each other, are in a great system of synergy, and notice how we are stronger as a group. The sum of these parts of the group are greater than the individual parts. A line from one of my favorite songs says,”I like me better when I’m with you.”

So when you find yourself in a group where you are asking yourself, “what’s the problem?” Think “autonomy,” and move into action.

Remember, everyone is a masterpiece.

Brook

It Only Takes 3 Seconds to Identify the Blackened Personality

Posted on September 25, 2018May 30, 2023 by Brook Thornley

You can tell the Blackened design or personality in 3 seconds when they walk through the door.

“I’m here, I have an appointment right now, let’s get started so we will end on time.”
Their movement is deliberate and on purpose and it makes you want to jump in and participate in the task; whatever it might be.
“What’s our time frame? I have another appointment after this.”

It is so beautiful. The room seems to immediately turn casual, any pretenses gone as if the sun is beating down and bathing you after a long day of hard work. Like a nap on a warm beach with waves crashing on you and leaving a little sand on our face to remind you that you are here. It is rich yet earthy, similar to a thunderstorm beating down on you while you are running through the streets laughing and dancing in bare feet. You feel yourself drinking in the casual warmth and find yourself opening up like you never have before, responding to their honesty and realness like a good old friend that you feel secure with.

You notice that the Blackened person is giving you honest advice in a truthful way that is nurturing; and can abruptly switch your direction to one that is realistic and secure. It’s as if they don’t want you to spend one more minute wasting time on something that won’t serve you. You feel secure yet nurtured—similar to a walk in the mountains with all its honesty. You notice the Blackened person is caring for you through tasks. They get you a chair, or a plate of food, even a blanket when you are cold. That’s their charm. This is an example of what it feels like to get thrown into a 3 second interaction with someone that has a lot of Blackened in their personality.

We sometimes forget to notice their “get ‘r done” nature. Everything they do is designed to protect—to protect those around them, those they love, those they don’t even know. Their ability to fix things, no matter what they are, is uncanny. It is as if their body moves to fix a problem before their mind even can finish processing what it is. They do that on the way.

Sometimes we dismiss their directness as someone who is tactless, when really they are just trying to get to the what, where, and why of every situation. They are so resourceful. They can fix whatever is wrong with just what resources are in the room.

Common question have to do with resources.

“Did you get that done?”
“How did you do it?”
“Did you put that away?”
We can better engage them through structure.
“What needs to be done first?”
“What makes more sense right now?”
“What will save resources?”

A Blackened person does not appreciate the drama or the “fluff.” They are the “get to it” group; not a lot of talking just a lot of doing. They prefer serving someone over having a meeting about it. They are very hands on. If you truly want to engage them in a caring way just take something off their list of things to do. They appreciate it because they are probably doing that for you to show how much they care.

This week, make it a point to find as many people as you can who have a high amount of Blackened in their personality. We all have amounts of each harmony in us, but it is pretty obvious that someone has high amounts of Blackened when you look for the traits that we have discussed. Please take the time to enjoy the beauty of it. Even if you don’t get the exact amount of Blackened, that’s ok, at least you are giving them some of your time to see their beauty.

Remember, everyone is a masterpiece.

Brook

Read about the other designs:
Saturated
Whitened
Grayed

It Only Takes 3 Seconds to Identify the Grayed Personality

Posted on September 18, 2018May 30, 2023 by Brook Thornley

You can tell the Grayed design or personality in 3 seconds when they walk through the door.

“um…”
“Is this the right time. Am I in the right place?”
Their movement is flowing and continuous.
“Can you tell me where I am supposed to go.”

It is so beautiful. The room seems to take on a dreamy and mystical ambience. It is calm yet refined. It is as if a magical mist entered the room. Similar to a spray of rain where the drops blend together. You feel your shoulders drop a bit and sigh. It feels like settling into a soft comfortable chair. You find yourself weaving into a conversation and connecting deeply with the person. You notice that the Grayed person is wanting to know what you need and prefer. They are genuinely interested in the details of your experience. This is an example of what it feels like to descend into the deep end of a 3 second interaction with someone who has a lot of Grayed in their personality.

We sometimes forget to notice the meticulous nature of everything a Grayed person does. Their ability to process and think about the “what could be, might be, and should be” is their brilliance. It is done in such an understated and conservative way. Sometimes we dismiss their meticulous inquiry as a studious interrogation when really every detail is designed to protect others from making preventable mistakes. Their strength is their ability to help us ponder things and consider all the contingencies. If we would just stop and unfold their method, we would understand how deeply they care and want to connect with those around them. They would help us to intensely experience the highs and lows of life and be there to catch us when we fall. Do not underestimate their ability to care.

Common questions have to do with the details and how things will move and flow.

“The last time we talked, you mentioned your project. How is that going?”
“Hold on. Go back and tell me more about…”
“Wait. Can we think this through? You said…”

We can more comfortably engage them by easing into conversations or dynamics. Grayed people tend to not appreciate change and confrontation but they are great at collaboration if you will slow down and give them adequate time to consider the details.

Sometimes they like to ask all the questions and sometimes they just want to listen. They romance through the details no matter who is talking. The general rule with the Grayed personality is focus on the details and avoid abrupt starts and stops.

“Last week we were trying to solve this problem, Can we talk more about it.”
“It is getting closer to the time we have to make the decision, can we talk about a few more details.”

The Grayed personality is sensitive. It is mysterious and intuitive. They like depth in every interaction. They like traditions and thread relationships over time. They like fewer closer relationships.

This week make a point to find as many people as you can who have a high amount of Grayed in their personality. We all have amounts of each harmony in us. It is pretty obvious that someone has high amounts of Grayed when you look for the traits we have discussed. Please take the time to enjoy the beauty of it. Even if you don’t get the exact amount of Grayed, that is ok, at least you are giving them some time to see their beauty.

Remember everyone is a masterpiece.

Brook

Read about the other designs:
Saturated
Whitened
Blackened

FREE Webinar! The Science, The Study, The Art

Posted on September 11, 2018May 30, 2023 by Brook Thornley

At Human Art, when we meet someone new we can determine their personality within seconds of them walking through the door. The concept of a “Harmony” is the principle in which we can determine what personality traits they have. We can do that because each harmony has elements that cluster, where one is so are the others—we can count on that fact. We use four elements: color, line, sound and movement. The colors that you have an affinity to, the lines in your bone structure, your sound when you speak and also non-verbal sounds, and your movement-how you walk, how you sway your arms when you walk, etc.

When asked, most people can recognize different lines in bone structure. They at least understand the concept. A lot of people can even see the sound and movement reasonably in others when looking for it. The element that we get the most questions on is how we use color. We want to explain that to you. For that reason, we are hosting a free webinar to explain about color.

We will be giving you insights into the business of Human Art and how we use color. We are going to focus on you that night and how that can benefit you.

Your Homework

This week while we are preparing for the webinar, your job is to notice how many times a day you are required to pick a color you like. Observe what is going on at the time and who is asking you and for what purposes. It could be someone asking you your favorite color (that's a classic). Maybe it’s for a gift someone wants to give you, so they ask you to pick a color. Maybe it’s a business owner being asked to pick a color for a business card or paint for a new office. Maybe it’s a mom trying to motivate a child. A hairdresser trying to design a new look. A designer creating something just for you…

Keep track on your phone or jot it down on paper and let’s talk about it on Monday. Can’t wait to see you then!

Remember, everyone is a masterpiece.

Brook

It Only Takes 3 Seconds to Identify the Whitened Personality

Posted on September 4, 2018May 30, 2023 by Brook Thornley

You can tell the Whitened design or personality within three seconds when they walk through the door.

“You are here, I’m so excited!”
Their movement busy and is maximum movement
“I have an appointment, I’m so glad it’s you…”

*Copyright Human Art: The Original Personality Test*

It is so beautiful; the room seems to come to life. It’s as if a fresh, yet light, swirling breeze came in the room; similar to when leaves pirouette in circles when caught in a warm summer wind.
You feel yourself relax and you are suddenly caught up in enrolling with those around you. It’s like springtime when you hear the first bird start singing. It feels as if you are watching the sun come through the door after a cold rain. You forget all your worries and for a few minutes you smile and get caught up in the conversation. This is an example of what it feels like to get softly yet swiftly bounced into a 3 second interaction with someone who has a lot of Whitened in their design.

We sometimes forget to notice their advanced social engagement and how they can somehow pay attention to everyone in the room. That ability to absorb so many dynamics with so many people at the same time is their brilliance, and yet it’s done in such a light and no-guile way with no agenda, just being present to see what will happen next. Sometimes we make the mistake of labeling this unassuming and youthful attitude for one that is scattered or random; but if we stop and peek into their method, we understand just how much information they can take in at one time, and truly concentrate on all of it, yet keep it so light at the same time. Do not underestimate their emotional intelligence. Instead ride the ride. They will bring you along in a fun commentator role.

Common questions they might ask usually have something to do with either social engagement or change.

“Hey come see, can you believe this?”…
“You know what would be so fun?”…
“I have an idea, so you want to just…”

We can engage them by enrolling them into our conversation. Often we won’t have to engage them because they usually initiate the conversation, so it is a service to them when you will jump in and participate in what they are doing. If you are introverted and find yourself not prone to participate comfortably, its ok, they also appreciate you participating by paying attention to what is going on. It is the same for them. The general rule with someone with a lot of Whitened is “if you’re happy, they are happy.”

“Oh I see that you have gathered some of the people around and are playing a team building game. I LOVE WATCHING THIS. It is so fun to observe.”

OR
“I WOULD LOVE TO JUMP IN.”

The Whitened personality is joyful. It is a happy state that is spontaneous and youthful. It has to have a free component to interactions. They thrive and recharge when people they love are around them. Social engagement is key. Any job is done better when someone is with them.

This week make it a point to find as many people as you can that have a high amount of Whitened in them. Even though we all have amounts of all four personality types in us, it is pretty obvious that someone has high amounts of Whitened in them when you look for these traits we’ve discussed. You will see it. Please take the time to enjoy the beauty of it. Even if you don’t get exactly the amount of Whitened in the person you are paying attention to, That’s ok, at least you are giving them some of your time to see their beauty.

Remember, everyone is a masterpiece.
Brook

Read about the other designs:
Saturated
Grayed
Blackened