Tag: Connect

The Power of Curiosity

The answer is curiosity!

The question is, “what is one thing that could significantly strengthen my ability to learn new skills and grow in my authentic self?”

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This is a question that was asked recently at Human Art. When we are teaching new skills to anyone that are designed to help one better themselves in relationships with self, with others around them, and in leadership or team building, one common thing that is required is curiosity.

When we are small and first learning to navigate this big world, curiosity is required. Some children get punished for it and we see the beginnings of a “shut down, stuff it,” type of relating to others. Where it can get really serious is if we are curious in our authenticity or our personality and we get negative feedback of any kind. It leaves us with no discovery and no idea where to go with those confusing emotions.

So I propose we say “YES” to implementing curiosity in our lives! Let me give you an example.

In this line of work I see that, in general, humans have a STRONG desire to learn about their own personality or design. They want to know what their authenticity looks like, how to use it, and how to define it. That’s the kind of curiosity I’m talking about. What I’ve been observing while looking at curiosity is that humans are not always as willing to be as curious about other people’s designs; the people they love, the people they work with, their friends, etc.

Let’s start by looking at the different types of curiosity in the designs:

The Saturated design is curious in the way of collecting the components of any conversation or dynamic. They need all of the pieces before they can draw a conclusion. They need to know what is the best solution or the “one most important fact” to be able to make a declaration and then start sequencing it.

The Whitened person is curious to learn people’s preferences. They are attuned to others’ preferences at a deeper level. They notice likes and dislikes and do it in a non-threatening way. They thrive off of sincerity.

The Grayed person is curious in the connection. The connection with others, the connections of possibilities, the connections that can help, and the connections that might hurt. It is a meticulous openness full of details.

The Blackened person is curious about the what, why and how. It is like the air they breath. It is how they discover new ideas, best way to do a task, and how they get to know together people.

When we expand our curiosity with self and with others, in a way where we are constantly discovering and learning new things about each other, our curiosity transforms into empathy and compassion. Then you are on your way to seeing that everyone is full of worth and value just the way they are, in their authenticity. When we celebrate that fact, we move to learning and growing in our authenticity in a way that did not seem possible.

Remember, everyone is a masterpiece.

-Brook

Listen Like You Are Watching a YouTube Video

A small girl and her mom were in the ice cream shop sitting at a small table eating an ice cream. The girl was busily eating the ice cream and the mother was engrossed in her phone, concentrating for what seemed like a long amount of time. The girl ate away. This went on for a while. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the mom looked up at the girl and said, “come over here.” They both posed close to each other with looks of exuberance and excitement. The woman snapped a quick pic and then in a nanosecond it was back to the same stations. The girl returned to her chair and, bored, ate her ice cream. The woman took a few minutes to post the picture on her phone and followed with a very satisfied, “there.” The only thing that was spoken the entire time.

Source: ocusfocus / 123RF Stock Photo

This was an encounter a friend told me about the other day. As I have pondered this interaction, many thoughts flooded my mind. First, is “wow what is going on?” Second, I wondered how many times I have done that myself (I know I have). And third, if that were me what was so important that I would put that as a priority over stealing a moment with someone that I loved? For most of us it would probably be a video.

Don’t get the wrong impression, social medial and the ability to communicate with each other on our phones and electronic devices is, to me, a modern day miracle; I would not be able to navigate my business and go about my domestic responsibilities without it. I just think that sometimes we forget to manage and take advantage of the human miracles that we also have right in front of us in our close relationships. So here is my advice to you to make sure we are taking care of our human relationships.

Listen like you are watching  a YouTube video. Observe and listen. Those are two skills that are required in order to understand something or someone. When we are watching a video that is exactly what we do. We observe what is going on, how it is happening—we are curious. We listen intently and if we think we missed something we back it up and listen to that part again. If we could only do that as we interact in those important relationships that we have. Observe their nonverbal cues and what they are doing and then listen intently, being fully present just like we are watching a YouTube video. If we don’t get a part or miss something, back it up and play it again until we understand it.

Once you’ve done that, respond through the filter of the person’s design.

Source: imtmphoto / 123RF Stock Photo

If your loved one is Saturated, observe and listen for their one most important thing or fact and then respond with clarity.

If your loved one is Whitened, observe and listen for those cues of excitement and spontaneity and match their emotions.

If your loved one is Grayed, observe and listen for the details and stay a little longer in them, there is good information there.

If your loved one is Blackened, observe and listen to the problem and then fix it or respond in with possible solutions.

Try to filter out our own emotions and attitudes while we are listening, save that for our turn to respond. For that moment be completely present to see what that person is experiencing. Like being a detective. Think of that little girl in the ice cream shop and let it inspire us to treat those around us with curiosity for who they are and how they experience things. It will elicit appreciation, and you will find a lot of those close to you will return the interest right back.

Remember, everyone is a masterpiece.

Brook

Organize Yourself-Attract, Connect, Prosper

At Human Art: The Original Personality Test we get a lot of requests daily. They range from someone just needing to know something about their design (for example, “is this article my design?”), or something about their thought process, to someone ordering a class, a family reunion or a major corporate event. Needless to say, we are busy and we love it. We have three categories we put our requests or jobs under: Attract, Connect, and Prosper.

Attract is for personal growth. Knowing your design or authenticity and anything that can aid in discovering that. This is where individual consultations come in. It really has to do with your relationship with yourself.

Connect is, once you know yourself, how to better connect with others from that place of authenticity. This is a powerful category because it launches you into your life and connecting in a healthy way with others.

Prosper is how do you put that to use to find and bring more success in your life and in your everyday tasks. I think of this as working smarter, not harder, at what you do.

This is a great way to organize our message when we are serving our clients, but it is not JUST a great way for us to organize Human Art. It could be an amazing tool for YOU to organize each day. Every morning think to yourself: “Attract, Connect, Prosper.”

First, you want to do what you can to feel Attractive in your authenticity. My parents used to teach us to “get up and take whatever time you need to feel attractive in your authenticity.” It is an expression to the world of who you are. So whether it be a pair of jeans you love to show your casualness, or a whimsical pony tail to show your lightness, or even a stark beautiful suit to show your authority or simply a sweater or cologne to express your refinement, take that time. Look in the mirror a final time with approval for yourself and then turn and forget yourselves and go serve.

This leads me to Connect. The important part of connecting is two-fold. One, stay in your authenticity, but Two, always celebrate the differences of the person you are connecting with. Bask in the opposite energy that seems to live in you and those you connect with. When done in a positive way without labels it leads to amazing amounts of synergy. Instead of using the difference as a reason to lose credibility in those you deal with, us it as a starting point of negotiation. You will find great solutions in negotiating that way.

Once you can negotiate in that form it leads you right into more opportunities to Prosper. Prosper means finding your strengths authentically and using those in every task you have on your list, and doing them in your way. I find it works every time.

For example, the task might be to come up with a great new solution to a problem. A Saturated person will always find success when they deem their version of quality on the task and then go to work in a concomitant way with that one most important thing. A Whitened person will always keep in mind how everyone is interacting to find optimal social success. A party is truly a party when everyone is having a good time and they won’t settle until they do.  A Grayed person is brilliant in the details. Sometimes after an event I ask to just look at their lists that they made during the planning stages. It is a beautiful thing to see the number of details they cover and the meticulous nature in which they did. It is really like viewing a piece of art. Lastly, a Blackened person will just “get ‘r done.”  It’s as if they are moving forward before the orders are even finished being put in. They just start rolling. They are like small human versions of great big bulldozers and trackers and trucks and fleets…I could go on. You get the point. When a Blackened person walks on the job site you know things are going to get done. I appreciate that so much in a task. It brings stability to an event.

So wherever you are stop and think: “Attract, Connect, Prosper” and move forward in that way each day.

And remember, everyone is a masterpiece.

-Brook

Attract Connect Prosper